REPORT: Joe Simpson Gay Confession Shocks Family!

A family friend recently revealed to the media that the center of Joe Simpson’s divorce was that he had been a closet gay! That is just too much for me to handle. Listen, I’m a huge Jessica Simpson fan. Watching her reality show Newlyweds made me feel like I could have been accepted into Harvard–I mean the girl was so joyfully dumb. That didn’t stop me from being a major fan. Once she left her Nick Douchey, I started to lose a little bit of interest. The Dukes Of Hazard movie didn’t do it for me, and her running off with a football star pretty much ended my interest. Then, suddenly she was pregnant. Her baby popped out, and now her father is reportedly gay. What is the world coming to? I have no problem with my gays–I love them, but this one is pretty surprising for the youth pastor turned pop superstar manager. Apparently Jessica is pretty shocked, too. RadarOnline quote a “source” as saying: “Jessica had absolutely no clue that her father was gay, not even the slightest inkling…she thinks she has very good gaydar, especially since a lot of her friends are gay, but she did not [...]

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